Hump Day Humor ~~Bumper Sticker Edition July 30th

As I was preparing this Hump Day Humor post today, I realized that while I was doing the bumper sticker posts, Oil had become the dominant story in the news. I had posted the energy series with "why we must drill" about opening the coastal areas, as well as ANWAR, in addition to every other method available.
Anyway, I am going to continue with the Bumper Stickers today, with a compilation of three posts, and I hope your late Wednesday afternoon is Excellent!!

I get some weird and off beat catalogs, and a couple of them are the ones with the clever, funny, stupid slogans~~like bumper sticker type slogans, and the ones on t-shirts, so I thought what the heck, it is extremely slow at the Coral Ridge Mall, so why not find the best ones, and do a series of posts. I decided to break it up as it got kind of annoying reading through the whole list.
So here is part 9 in the series, and always if you have one that is not on the list, please send it to me at danielcarvelkepler@yahoo.com, or post it in the comments. Thanks:


Follow that car, Godzilla - and step on it !

Frankly, Scallop, I don't give a clam.

Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up!

I fought the lawn, and the lawn won.

If you can't read this, thank the teacher's union.

Procrastinate now.

The last time politics and religion were mixed, people were burned at the stake.

Rehab is for quitters.

My dog can lick anyone!

I have a degree in Liberal Arts - do you want fries with that?

Suburbia: Where they tear out the trees and name streets after them.

Do they ever shut up on your planet?

If you were born again, would you have two bellybuttons?

All men are idiots, and I married their King.

West Virginia: One million people, and 15 last names.

I'm out of estrogen and I've got a gun!

I'm always late. My ancestors arrived on the Juneflower.
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I get some weird and off beat catalogs, and a couple of them are the ones with the clever, funny, stupid slogans~~like bumper sticker type slogans, and the ones on t-shirts, so I thought what the heck, it is extremely slow at the Coral Ridge Mall, so why not find the best ones, and do a series of posts. I decided to break it up as it got kind of annoying reading through the whole list.
So here is part 10 in the series, and always if you have one that is not on the list, please send it to me at danielcarvelkepler@yahoo.com, or post it in the comments. Thanks:



A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

Who are these children, and why do they keep calling me Mom?

The trouble with life is there's no background music.

Mop and Glo - The floor wax used by Three-Mile-Island cleanup team.

NyQuil - The stuffy, sneezy, why-the-hell-is-the-room-spinning medicine.

Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research.

Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.

Gravity: It's not just a good idea. It's the law.

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

You - Off my planet.

If you are what you eat, I'm fast, cheap and easy.

Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.

Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

And your cry-baby whiny-a$$ed opinion would be...?

Warning: Dates on calendar are closer than they appear.

I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 30 years.

Allow me to introduce my selves.

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I get some weird and off beat catalogs, and a couple of them are the ones with the clever, funny, stupid slogans~~like bumper sticker type slogans, and the ones on t-shirts, so I thought what the heck, it is extremely slow at the Coral Ridge Mall, so why not find the best ones, and do a series of posts. I decided to break it up as it got kind of annoying reading through the whole list.
So here is part 11 in the series, and always if you have one that is not on the list, please send it to me at danielcarvelkepler@yahoo.com, or post it in the comments. Thanks:



Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.

Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you weren't asleep.

I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.

There's no place like 127.0.0.1

I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?

I'm supposed to back up my hard drive, but how do I put it into reverse?

You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.

Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done.

Earth is full. Go home.

Is it time for your medication or mine?

Nyquil: the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-hell-is-the-room-spinning medicine.

How do I set a laser printer to stun?

Getting on your feet means getting off your butt.

I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.

First National Bank of Dad; Sorry, closed.

In dog years, I'm dead!

South Korea's got Seoul!

Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye opener.

Above all else, sky.

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Happy Hump Day ;)