Hump Day Humor Final Bumper Sticker Edition

Happy Wednesday evening and a Hump Day Hello. Thursday is my only day off, so tomorrow is my "weekend" rest day, and I cannot wait. Anyway we are nearly to the end of the Bumper Sticker posts, and so I shall leave these with you this evening, and will bid you adieu until Friday.

I get some weird and off beat catalogs, and a couple of them are the ones with the clever, funny, stupid slogans~~like bumper sticker type slogans, and the ones on t-shirts, so I thought what the heck, it is extremely slow at the Coral Ridge Mall, so why not find the best ones, and do a series of posts. I decided to break it up as it got kind of annoying reading through the whole list.
So here is part 12 in the series, and always if you have one that is not on the list, please send it to me at danielcarvelkepler@yahoo.com, or post it in the comments. Thanks:



The trouble with the gene pool is that there's no lifeguard.

God made us sisters; Prozac made us friends.

IRS: Be Audit You Can Be

My mother is a travel agent for guilt trips.

Senior Citizen: Give me my damn discount!

(Spotted on a passing motorcycle): If you can read this, my wife fell off!

I used to be schizophrenic, but we're OK now.

Wanted: Meaningful overnight relationship.

I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.

Anything not worth doing is not worth doing well.

A day without sunshine is like night.

First things first, but not necessarily in that order.

Old age comes at a bad time.

If going to church makes you a Christian, does going into a garage make you a car?

In America, anyone can be president. That's one of the risks you take.

Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to ME.

Beer: It's not just for breakfast anymore.

So you're a feminist. Isn't that cute?

Part 13

I need someone real bad. Are you real bad?

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

The more you complain the longer God makes you live.

I R S: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.

Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.

Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.

Out of my mind - back in five minutes.

Without ME, it's just AWESO.

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.

Life would be easier if I had the source code.

Hang up and drive.

Nebraska: At least the cows are sane.

God must love stupid people. He made SO many.

I said "no" to drugs, but they didn't listen.

Your kid may be an Honor Student, but YOU'RE still an idiot.

I fish, therefore I lie.

Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

If catapults are outlawed, only outlaws will have catapults.

It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

Don't drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink.

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Rap is to music as Etch-A-Sketch is to art.

Honk If you want to see my finger.

God is my co-pilot, but the Devil is my bombardier.

I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.

Keep honking while I reload.

Part 14
Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!

Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.

EARTH FIRST! We'll strip-mine the other planets later.

If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you.

Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes.

Whitewater is over when the First Lady sings.

Jack Kevorkian for White House physician.

My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her (or something like that).

Constipation causes people not to give a crap.

Sure you can trust the government! Just ask a native American!

Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive.

Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!

Veni, Vedi, Visa: I Came, I Saw, I did a little shopping.

What if the hokey pokey is really what it's all about?

If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0!

Driver carries no cash. He's married.

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

Karaoke bars combine two of the nation's greatest evils: people who shouldn't drink with people who shouldn't sing.

If I get you advantage, can I take drunk of you?

Watch out for the idiot behind me.

I drive far too fast to worry about cholesterol!

So you're kids no honor student. Society needs laborers.

Honk if you hate peace and quiet.

I have the body of a god. Buddha.

And Here is the last and Final Part of this series~~~unless and until there are some "new" ones.
Part 15

In case of rapture, can I have your car?

Never miss a good opportunity to shut up.

I doubt, therefore I might be.

Your stupid!

When cryptography is outlawed, bayl bhgynjf jvyy unir cevinpl.

There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary, and those who don't.

Don't bother honking or flashing your lights, I'm deaf and blind.

Honk if you've never seen a gun fired from a moving vehicle.

Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once.

If it isn't broken, fix it until it is.

Thank God I'm an atheist.

Never knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run, he hates that.

Some days it's just not worth gnawing through the leather straps.

It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

New Mexico: Cleaner than regular Mexico.

Jesus died for my sins and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.

If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

If you're happy and you know it see a shrink.

Vegetarian: Indian word for lousy hunter.

Worry. God knows all about you.

I drive the speed limit. If you don't like it, call a cop!

Vote Democrat - it's easier than working!

Vote Republican - it's easier than thinking!

Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button.

Squirrels: Nature's speed bumps.

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.




And that was Part 15, thanks for reading.....I hope you find some that you will be recounting to others, or actually buying the bumper sticker, and putting it on your vehicle. To all of those people who put bumper stickers on your vehicles, thanks for the informative, and often amusing slogans. We have a lot of time sitting at red lights, or in road construction, and reading your bumper stickers is often the only thing there is to do. Thanks for defiling your vehicle just for us;)

Have a Great late Wednesday and all day Thursday!!

Take Care!!